The lamest song... ever

I hate when this happens! I'm driving last night with the radio on. It is a beautiful night. The sky is clear.. the air nice and cool and refreshing. I have the window down and breeze blowing in my face. They are playing some decent tunes on the radio. It couldn't be better.

Then it happens. Some idiot, somewhere, calls a radio station and asks them to play the lamest song ever written. And some stupid DJ decides to honor the request. Out of my speakers comes the dreaded lyrics, sang in a nasally whining soprano voice...

Whatever I said. Whatever I did. I didn't mean it. I just want you back for good.

Arrrrrrgrrrh! It is all I can do to resist kicking the shit out of my radio and ripping the speakers out of the dash with my bare hands. I can't turn off the radio fast enough. I check to make sure my ears aren't bleeding from this horrible song. If I crash my car into a bus full of nuns and orphans and cute puppies and make it explode, it wasn't my fault. The song made me do it.

The is something about that song "Back For Good", written by the band "Take That", that I detest. The whole song sucks. It is lame. But what kills me is the line "Whatever I said. Whatever I did. I didn't mean it. I just want you back for good." Isn't that the wimpiest, lamest, sorry-ass line you have every heard uttered from someone's mouth?

Dude! If you don't know what it was she is pissed off at you about, then why are you apologizing? Grow some balls for Christ's sake. Where the hell is your backbone? You should be telling her "I meant what I said. And if you can't handle it, then tough shit." No wonder she left your sorry ass. Telling her crap like that is just giving her more proof that she did the right thing by leaving some wimp who can't even back up his own words.

Oh man. This song makes my want to go hunt down the guy who wrote it and kick his ass. Who could even THINK of something so lame? Why didn't he name the song "I am am worthless and pathetic LOOSER with no self-esteem"?

It gets worse. As I sit here writing this rant that damn song is going through my head and I can't shut it off. Arrrrrrgh. Excuse me while I go find a gun and shoot myself in the brains.